My biggest pet peeve is being talked to AS SOON as I wake up.
I hate that shit.
Stop tryin to communicate with me.
Stop askin me questions.
I’m tryna understand the universe all over again don’t talk to me yet ur gonna confuse me and piss me off.
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A normal day for me
- Me: I'm hungry
- Me: Let's check tumblr
- Me: Oh nice Needle. I want my needle.
- Me: I'm close to my needle.
- Me: I should stretch.
- Me: Nah I'm hungry.
- Me: Oooh twitter.
- Me: Oooh Matt Smith. Let's lurk..
- Me: DAYUM DRAMA
- Me: I'm hungry
- Me: Strawberries or pudding?
- Me: Pudding.
- Me: Let's take a nap.
The daughter who won’t lift a finger in the house is the same child who cycles madly off in the pouring rain to spend all morning mucking out a stable.
(via rideforlifeorlove)
- friend: there's nothing worse than death
- me: final seasons
- me: post-concert depression
- me: when there's no food
- me: fictional characters dying
- me: hipsters blogs
- me: your crush asks someone else out
- me: no wi-fi
- friend:
- me: when porn appears on your dash while someone is behind you
- me (surprised): omg
- me (amused): omg
- me (angry): omg
- me (sad): omg
- me (nostalgic): omg
- me (annoyed): omg
- me (scared): omg
Life Story
- Me: Why can't I have Jamie's body
- Me: Why can't I look like Maison
- Me: Why can't I be as famous as Maddie
- Me: Why can't I tumble like Kiara
- Me: Why can't I be as flexible as Gabi
- Me: Why can't I dance like Oreo
- Me: Why can't I have Matt Smith
I think a part of me will always love everyone I have ever loved. Even the boy who made me feel weak, there’s a small part of me that will always be the person I was then, and that small part will always love him. And the boy who made me good again, half of me will always love him, because the other half has changed. I take parts of everyone I love with me everywhere I go.
Written by sanktuairy (via sanktuairy)
basically me at school everyday
- me: i hate all of you
- me: stop screaming you saw your friend yesterday
- me: holy fuck walk faster
- me: get smarter idiot
- me: maybe if i hit my head on my desk enough times i'll die
Why being a girl isn't working out for me:
- Body: Oh, guess what time of the month it is!
- Me: Please, god, no--
- Ovaries: ALL SYSTEMS GOOOOOOOO!!!
- Brain: I quit. i quit. kittens and cupcakes and no one loves me. oh my god salty snacks i am furious
- Me: Please, guys, calm down--
- Face: TIME TO RUIN EVERYTHING YOU HAVE EVER LIKED ABOUT ME. I'M GROWING MOUNTAINS, BITCHES.
- Brain: And now I'm ugly! shbdksdnksbn
- Torso: Time to practice labor. cramp this bitch up. GO GO GO GO GO GO
- Me: STOP IT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!
- Stomach: lol clothes cant fit you anymore. you are bloated. you are now a balloooooooon!
- Me: I hate you all
- Brain: I KNOW EVERYONE HATES ME I AM SO DEPRESSED. we need to procreate.
- Face: Lol, i'm not done yet.
- Uterus: what did i ever do to deserve this?
- Brain: you just wait uterus. they're going to make you hold a baby for like 9 months straight.
- Uterus: You mother fuckers.
- Torso: CONTRACT!
- Me: I quit being female, I am now a llama.
- Brain: Me gusta.
Humor is attractive.
I love when a person can give me a really good smile and/or laugh. It doesn’t take a lot for me to like you. If you can legitimately make me feel happy, even in the slightest way, I’ll fall for you right on the spot. Humor is definitely a plus for me, because then I know that on my worst days; someone like you could always cheer me up again.

